Just because
by nikitabella
Summary: 'Then you kiss her and she runs away and you get scared shitless of losing her. So here you are, drunk as shit because you don't know if you should be happy that she's your best friend or sad that that's all you'd ever be to her.' JASPER one-shot.


**AN: This was actually supposed to come out in May...I know, I'm horrible. Anyway, read and review but most of all ENJOY!**

 **P.S. Yes IniTiniNini, Jack and Maddie are all yours.**

I was already in bed when a ping alerted me of receiving a new message. Without looking away from the episode of Criminal Minds that I had put on earlier, I stretched towards my bedside table and brought my phone to my line of vision.

 _Please don't tell me that you're already asleep.-J_

I paused the show and quickly typed back a response.

 _Not yet. CM marathon, why?-P_

I turned to the screen again and laughed out loud at the frozen image of Hotch's funny face. My phone buzzed, earning my attention again.

 _You're such a nerd. It's barely eleven on a Saturday evening!-J_

 _Says the Game of thrones' biggest fanboy alive. And what happened with your 'date'?-P_

 _Her mom picked her up…-J_

I couldn't help it, I burst out laughing. Hard. Sure, I was pathetic for not having anything to do on a Saturday night but having your mom pick you up from a date? Dude, we're in college, not kindergarten!

 _Lol, feeling old already Sparky?-P_

 _Oh ha-ha. And this from my best friend? I'm profoundly wounded!-J_

 _You're a drama queen!-P_

 _Which reminds me, Sherlock for our movie night on Friday?-J_

I shook my head. He was trying to distract me so I could stop teasing him. Fat chance of that ever happening and he should know better but I decided to let it slide for now. It would be much better to laugh at him when I could see his face.

 _Yep. Sure you'll be free though?-P_

 _Friday is our day McQueen, wouldn't trade you for a chick. ;)-J_

 _McQueen, I'm a girl too you know.-P_

 _We're best friends therefore you are with priority.-J_

My fingers paused before typing a response while I stared at the text. Thoughts and emotions that I didn't want swirled in me for a few seconds before I shook my head and restarted the episode I was watching before. I hoped that my response hadn't come with a noticeable delay or if so, that he hadn't noticed.

 _I'm honored. CM's calling to me, see ya!-P_

 _And left alone again, thanks Piper. Night. :)-J_

I put my phone away again and stared at the screen, not able to fully concentrate. Not that it was something new or anything but that's what it made it all the more frustrating. But maybe I should explain first?

Jason and I? Yeah, we're best friends since…third grade if I'm not mistaken. We met on my first day at the school in L.A.. I've just moved in town with my dad so he can work on his acting career and he wasn't around much, leaving me with the nanny when his agent called for him. It was a little hard to get used to not always be with him but I met new people at school and became really close friends with Jason so it was manageable.

By the end of the school year and the start of the next we were practically joined at the hip. We went at the same high school after that and even though he was a year older, he never ditched me. We grew up together which meant that when he started to get interested in girls, I was the only one that he wasn't looking at as a potential girlfriend. It was the same with me when it came down to boys. Don't get me wrong, he was a pretty good-looking teenager, smart and cute and all that jazz but he was a player back then. The only thing that didn't drive me away from him was the fact that his personality didn't change all that much. He was still the same kind and funny guy I had befriended.

I often teased him that he'll never settle that way and he teased me that I wasn't going to either if I continued being alone. But it wasn't my fault that the guys from school were either jerks, already taken or completely immature to the point of still organazing battles with paper airplanes at the age of seventeen.

The change for me came at the end of high school when Jason invited me to be his prom date. It was his idea and we both agreed that it would be cool to go as friends but when he invited me for the first dance of the night, something in me just snapped. And suddenly I was a stumbling, blushing mess in his arms and he was all sweet smiles and hushed speaking in my ear while dancing. I didn't know where all the queasiness in my stomach came from but I didn't like it.

If I had to describe my messed up feelings with one word it would be bittersweet. Sure, it felt very good to be his best friend. Jason was loyal and honest. He was always there when I needed him and it went both ways. I'd always loved the security of knowing that no matter what, if I called him he would pick up. He was able to make me laugh when I was in the mood for crying or be serious when the situation wanted it. He was always there.

On the other hand, knowing that I'm friendzoned for all eternity was depressing sometimes. Looking at some of the girls he dated through the years, I was wondering why I wasn't good enough? It made me question myself on so many levels when it came to physical appearance that I always tried to avoid being alone and thinking about him like that, like he could ever be more than my best friend.

All in all, it was bad. I had a crush on my best friend.

Our friendship was too important to me so I've swore to myself that whatever happens, I'll never admit these feelings to him.

I didn't notice when I've drifted off to sleep until my phone blared in the morning. I felt so exhausted that I barely managed to reach the offending device and, after accepting the call, to put it on my cheek so I wouldn't need to hold it with my hand.

''Ugh.'' I grunted into the speaker in a way of greeting to which I only heard a snort.

''Good morning to you too Pipes.'' Jason's voice made me finally open my eyes just to realize that I had fallen asleep still propped up on the headboard of my bed.

My back cracked loudly as I tried to straighten up from the awkward position I had slept in and I winced at how sore I felt. This day wasn't starting very well.

''Yeah, hi. What did I miss?'' I finally managed to croak out and winced once again at the sound of my voice. Why was it that when I woke up, I always sounded like an old smoker with a sore throat? I tried to clear my voice without making too much noise.

''Not much, I was just wondering if you were free for breakfast. I need an advice about my presentation and you popped in my mind first.'' He explained casually and I could very well imagine him grinning.

''Gee, I wonder why that is?'' I said sarcastically while awkwardly climbing out of bed. ''Does it happen to have anything to do with my creative writing classes?''

''You know me, I always opt for the best.'' He said cheekily, his smile evident in his voice. ''So are you free?''

I laughed at that. ''As a bird, where do you wanna meet?''

''Hestia's?''

I glanced at the time and grinned. Breakfast sounded like heaven, especially if it was in the form of homemade waffles.

''I'll meet you there in thirty.'' And with that we both ended the call.

Time to get ready for the day. But first, I was going to hit the shower.

* * *

Our business talk ended in the first fifteen minutes. Apparently, he had finished his presentation and only wanted me to read it one more time ''just in case''. I shook my head but didn't say anything. With him and Reyna both being valedictorians of their class it was hard to believe that he was dyslexic.

''All done.'' I announced after I've gone through the last slide of his work. ''No major mistakes, I think there were five in total. Not that I'm surprised.'' I rolled my eyes for good measure which earned me one of his goofy ear-to-ear grins that he hides for his friends only.

''I am that predictable?'' he asked, trying to come out as surprised but he's too bad of an actor.

My grin widened and I leaned on the table to take a sip from my grapefruit juice, my eyes never leaving his. He leaned forwards too, pretending to be super nervous, waiting for my answer and I almost choke on my juice from laughing. I shake my head.

''No McQueen, I just know you that well.''

''And still, you don't know all of me.'' He insisted, spoon out of the coffee mug and pointing at me. I snort again.

''And since when do you keep secrets from me Jace?'' I asked before chuckling lightly.

When his response didn't come for a few seconds, I looked up at him again just to find him looking away, eyebrows scrunched and…was he actually blushing? I narrowed my eyes at him but the rosy colouring of his ears and neck had disappeared as fast as it had come. I shook my head. It was probably from the sun that was shining on him through the window. With his pale complexion it affected his skin in no time. But still, he hadn't said anything.

''Jason?''

''Yeah?'' he suddenly looked back at me and smiled brightly, reassuring me that nothing was wrong. ''Sorry, I just zoned out for a little.'' And before I could say anything else, he had launched into another topic. ''So, today is Nico's birthday and I'm throwing a party for him at our place. You're officially invited.''

My brows shot up immediately. A party on Sunday evening? Pass.

''No can do Jase, I have classes tomorrow morning.'' I apologized. It wasn't as if I was going to miss much, Jason's roommate was an introvert and the few people that he knew I hadn't met. In fact, I was pretty sure that our only mutual acquaintance was Jason.

''Okay, first of all, I clearly remember you jumping up and down last week because that particular class you have first thing Monday morning was canceled.'' He confronted me with a serious expression. ''And second, I haven't seen you going out in so long! I'm starting to get worried for you Pipes.''

''That's so not true, I went out with Annabeth for lunch on Friday! And it wasn't even in the library!'' I defended myself but it only seemed to amuse him.

''Annabeth is your roommate and lunch doesn't count. I'm talking about nightlife Mclean, dancing, drinking, having a good time in general…''

''Gods, sometimes I really miss Mr. Goody-two-shoes from high school.'' I complained but he only laughed. ''Since when I keep you out of trouble?''

''I haven't change that much!'' he pouted and I couldn't help but laugh. He noticed my reaction and I saw the gears turning up in his head.

After a second my smile faltered. Damn him and his puppy dog face. It always made my determination waver and he knew it. That's exactly why he used it so rarely on me, ''so I won't get used to it'' as he loved to say. Truth was, I wasn't sure that I could ever get immune to this face. He just looked so cute and wounded, his blue eyes seeming almost watery…it always made me feel as if I had kicked a whole crate of puppies on my way to hell.

''Come on, do it for me. One night, just one little party…''

I tried to resist. I really did try but I failed miserably.

''Oh for the love of…fine! I'll come but if I'm hung-over tomorrow, I'm going to make your life a living hell, do you hear me?'' I threatened him, purposefully leaving my anger on display.

His grin was so wide when he hears my response. ''I love you too Pipes.''

And that's how I ended up in his dorm building at eight the same evening. I knew the way to Jason's dorm as the back of my hand so I wasn't surprised to find myself in front of his door without any memories of the walk to there. My mind was still at home, going through the latest task I was given: to write a historically-related story about love and politics. How hard it could be, you would ask, since there are so many real stories on this topic? Well, that's why it's so hard to be original.

I only realized where I was when I heard rather loud music and a lot of voices through the door. My brows shot up as I wondered how many people were exactly in there. As I was about to knock, considering if it was needed at all or it would be better to just enter, the door swung open and a body knocked in me so hard that we almost went stumbling to the ground.

''Oh hey, are you okay?'' I looked up to see that it was the birthday boy himself. Nico was as per usual frowning though I suppose that it was partially because he almost knocked me over.

''Yeah, it's fine don't sweat it. Happy Birthday.'' I smile at him, trying to not feel uncomfortable (harder said than done).

''Thanks.'' He sounds somehow tired and I look past his shoulder to see the swarm of people, crowding the dorm room.

''Wow, how many people are actually there?'' I asked in bewilderment and he turned in the same direction.

''Jason.'' He sighed as if that's the only explanation needed for this situation. When I didn't answer him, he rolled his eyes with exasperation and explained. ''He thinks that I should interact with people more so practically, this is my whole study group and a few other people that I've met around campus.''

''Ah, I get it now.'' I nodded and patted him on the shoulder. ''That's Jason for you, sorry.''

I didn't expect a response, Nico wasn't one to talk about his feeling...actually, he didn't talk about anything that much, but then he slumped against the opposite wall, hands deep in his pockets and glared at the crowd.

''It's not that I don't appreciate his effort, because really, I do. Not many people would stick around as much as he had but I'm just not in the mood for partying. I told him this but did he listen? Nooo!'' he sighed yet again. ''Sometimes I wonder if he purposefully ignores what I tell him or is just being naturally blond.''

Despite everything, I laughed. Nico stared at me with disbelief and I shook my head, unable to talk. When I calmed down a little, I realized that I had leaned on him for support. More surprisingly, he hadn't pushed me away as he usually did when someone tried to touch him. I pulled away but my smile didn't waver when I lifted up my present for him.

''I guess this will help?''

He looked at me, then at the bottle of Tequila, then back at me before finally taking it. A small smile appeared on his face, one that made him look more friendly than I have ever seen him during our short…well, friendship was a strong word for it but maybe we were getting there.

''For me?''

''You are the birthday boy, right? I thought that you deserved a present.''

He studied me for a couple more seconds before pushing away from the wall and gesturing for me to follow him inside.

''Piper Mclean, you just became my favorite person at this party.'' He announced seriously and then we both laughed.

We made our way through the throng of people and to the small kitchenette they had. As if from thin air, Nico pulled out two plastic cups and then poured a good amount of the clear liquid for both of us. I had downed half of my drink when I finally saw Jason.

''What's with him?'' I asked out loud when I noticed his uncharacteristically annoyed expression. I tried to gain his attention, but he had his nose buried in his phone. I sighed.

''Beats me, he looked normal fifteen minutes ago.'' Nico shrugged, downing the rest of his drink before refilling his cup again.

My phone started ringing then and I tried to fish it out of my purse with only one hand. But before I had managed to pull it out, it stopped ringing.

''Oh thank god, I thought that you decided to skip.'' Jason's voice came from behind me and I glanced at the screen of my phone just to see that he was the one calling me. I smiled at myself before turning to him.

''I said I would come, right. Now tell me why you look like you've swallowed a whole lemon?'' I asked, eyeing him carefully.

''Drew is here. Don't ask why or how because I don't have an idea. Just help!'' he looked pleadingly at me and I couldn't help but laugh out loud, even leaning on the counter behind me for support.

''Payback's a bitch. Literally.'' I managed to say before bursting out again.

''Yeah, no kidding.'' He agreed solemnly, which kind of sobered me up too. ''Can I ask you a favour?''

I eyed him with suspicion. Why was he nervous?

''Okay, what did your little blond head came up with this time?'' I crossed my arms in front of me.

He scratched the back of his neck awkwardly before taking a deep breath and finally speaking:

''Just…pretend that we're together for the rest of the night so she can stay away?''

Oh yeah, I blushed like a schoolgirl. Pretending to be his girlfriend…how? Only the thought of it made me shiver and gulp. I couldn't do it, if I got carried away I would blurt something stupid. I was already feeling the effect of the alcohol in me, which was even worse. I tended to lose my verbal filter when drunk. I had a bad feeling about this.

''If I didn't know any better honey, I would have thought that you're trying to avoid me.'' Drew's voice reached me and I gritted my teeth. She appeared from behind Jason and when she spotted me, her seductive smile turned into a mocking sneer. ''Oh, and Dumpster queen of course. Still trailing behind those higher than you I see.''

Drew was one of the bitchiest brats Jason had ever dated. Thank god that they only lasted about two weeks or so before I caught her making out with another guy behind campus one day. I had just started college here and got lost easily because of the enormity of the place. Jason wasn't that devastated to break it off with her and I was elated. She was rude and mean without a real reason, one look at me and she had already decided that she didn't like me.

''Hi Drew. You still sucking faces with everything that breaths?'' I smiled sweetly at her.

Her smile gave way to a deep scowl, twisting her face in such a way that I almost laughed. She looked like a bad comic, coloured by a three-year-old.

''I see that you've tried to at least look like a girl. Too bad it didn't work.'' She sent me a fake sympathetic look and I felt my fists tighten.

In real honesty, I really tried to look good tonight. Annabeth encouraged me to dress up a bit and I decided what the heck, it couldn't hurt. I thought we've done a decent job, putting my wavy hair in a high ponytail. My dress was casual and not too revealing. With flats and a short denim jacket, it actually looked kind of cute. Now though, I felt out of place. Especially next to Drew and her always fashionable clothes. Drew Tanaka could be many bad things but she sure knew how to dress up.

I felt warm fingers wrapping around my tightened fist, praying it open and gripping my palm tightly. A sideway glance showed me that Jason was standing close next to me, our forearms touching while his fingers rested between mine.

''Nice seeing you Drew but we're going to go now. I owe my girl a dance.'' He turned to me and winked, catching me totally of guard. It was good that he started leading me away from her before she could see my confusion.

We didn't talk as we made our way towards a table, full of different drinks. He handed me a cup and I didn't even ask what was in it before downing it in one swift motion. When I put it down, I noticed Jason looking at me with an amused expression, eyebrows raised as if asking me what the hell I was doing. I just shrugged and extended my hand towards him.

''You promised me a dance, right?'' I asked. He grinned and grabbed my hand just to twirl me around before pulling me closer.

''When have I ever broken a promise?''

After that, the party was just a blur of dancing, laughing and drinking. At some point a slow song sounded and I found myself in Jason's embrace, close enough to feel the heat radiating from his body. The words of the song were forcing different images in my head and I found myself blushing madly.

 _My heart's against your chest, your lips pressed to my neck_

 _I'm falling for your eyes, but they don't know me yet_

 _And with this feeling I'll forget, I'm in love now_

''Drew's wrong you know.'' He interrupted my daydreaming and I shyly looked up just to see him smiling tenderly at me. I waited for him to elaborate but he took his time, twirling me around slowly, before leaning closer to my face, his lips at my ear. ''I think you look beautiful. You always do.''

I couldn't help the violent shivers that ran down my spine just then. I pulled away from him but whatever words I had to say got lost on their way to my mouth at the mere sight of his intense gaze. My heart skipped a beat and then started speeding up. I couldn't decide if I wanted to press myself closer to him or to run away as fast as I could. He was watching me…as if he wanted me.

''Jason…''

Suddenly, his lips were on mine and all coherent thought left my brain. The only thing I could think about was the pure bliss that I felt at the contact. Finally!

And then the spell was broken by the sudden change of the song. We pulled apart simultaneously and stood at an arm's length just watching the other with disbelief. His mouth was opening and closing like a fish out of water with no words coming out.

''Piper, I'm so…sorry. I didn't…'' his words faded away after that. They didn't matter. He had already said everything that I needed to hear.

I was numb and cold when I made a step back. I didn't know if I was interrupting him or if he was just standing there staring at me. All I knew was that I needed to get out right now, to put as much distance between us so I can think.

''It's okay, I...I-I'm gonna go. See ya.'' I mumbled before turning around and swiftly making my way towards the exit.

He didn't follow me.

* * *

I'd like to say that everything went back to normal. I would like to say that we talked shit through on the next morning and everything was okay between us again. But the truth was that I didn't hear from Jason for the next three days.

Monday morning was terrible, not just because it was Monday, but because of the thousand leprechauns Irish-dancing in my head. I managed only to dull the throbbing with a painkiller and coffee which was very bad since I had to show up for classes shortly after. But somehow, I managed to not fall asleep during three-hour lecture and even take some notes!

During the day, the only thought in my head was about my small comfy bed back at the dorm and the sweet, sweet bliss of the blinders that would block the last sunlight streaming right on my pillow. Only when that actually happened and I was tucked in bed, ready to drift off at 5 P.M., did Jason crossed my mind. Or the fact that I hadn't heard from him all day actually. Yeah, that definitely woke me up like nothing else.

I picked my phone from my discarded bag on the foot of the bed and easily found his number. My finger paused right over the call button. Should I really call him? Did I want to hear him? Okay, stupid one, of course I wanted to hear him, what if something had happened? But what if his silence meant that he was the one that didn't want to hear from me? I debated this until Annabeth got back from her own classes at about six.

''Piper, are you okay?'' she asked, sounding suspicious while putting away her bag and jacket.

''Um…kind of. Why?'' I answered, finally looking up from the small device in my hand. She was tying her hair up in a messy bun, her calculating eyes trained at me under her raised eyebrows.

''You look like shit. What happened at the party last night?''

''I…well, Jason kind of kissed me.'' I finally blurted out.

Her eyes widened in surprise and she forgot her task of putting the blond curls out of her face. In two long strides she was next to my bed, plopping right in front of me. She was still staring and I had to admit that it was intimidating. Her grey eyes were just too…sharp. As if she wanted to cut my head open and read everything that I was thinking right this moment.

''What do you mean kind of kissed you? Did he or did he not?'' she insisted.

I started playing with my phone, turning it over and over in my hands, while I explained to her the whole Drew-situation and how everything led to the kiss.

''And I haven't heard a word from him ever since, which is bad, it has to be bad because I can't recall a day in which I haven't gotten even the shortest text from him! And now he's decided to shut me off and I don't know what to do Annabeth! Help!'' I was breathing harder at the end of my rant.

Annabeth, God bless her and her rational mind, put her hands on my shoulders and shook me gently.

''Okay, just calm down. There's no need to panic. It's only been a day! Maybe he's too hungover and forgot to call or he slept in or something. Did you try to call him?''

''No.'' I admitted.

''Well, maybe you should. What's the worst that can happen anyways?''

''Uhm, him not wanting to see me ever again?''

She laughed. Annabeth Chase laughed at my misery and that was the only time I felt the temptation to strangle her.

''Not funny Chase!''

''You know better than me that that's never happening Piper!'' she finally said after calming down a bit. ''You are not just some random girl that he made out with in a bar, you're his best friend. Gods, the guy calls you every evening just to talk about stuff, you can't really tell me that you believe that just because of a small kiss he's going to cut loose all ties with you? Be realistic please.''

Okay, I had to admit that she was making sense. It wasn't such a big deal, right, just a small kiss. And this was Jason, he would tell me if he had made such a decision as to not see me again. We tell each other everything.

''Maybe you're right. I'm overreacting.'' I finally agreed with her.

''Of course I'm right.'' She beamed with that teasing smile of hers that immediately pulled one out of me too. ''I bet that he'll call you first thing in the morning just to wake you up as usual.''

We both laughed at that. With my fears settled I finally went to sleep.

* * *

He didn't call the whole day after that. I texted him three times, just the normal stuff like hey, what's up and are you avoiding me. Okay, the last one wasn't normal by a lot of standards but by the time evening came, Annabeth's pep-talk from the day before really started to lose its effect. And the fact that no answers came dampened my mood even further.

By lunch on Wednesday my sadness and concern had turned into anger. I had seen him in the morning when I came earlier to campus. He was definitely looking fine, not injured or traumatized in any way. When I noticed him talking with this girl I'd seen around a few times I almost laughed out loud. And here I was worrying about hundreds of stuff that involved him while he didn't give a crap about me. How pathetic could I get?

I tried to occupy myself with classes-related work which wasn't hard since I had a few assignments that had been waiting for me to finish them for forever. Annabeth was already sound asleep while I was still debating on how exactly to continue my story so it would still follow the basic plot that the professor gave me when my phone rang.

''Shit!'' I muttered while scrambling for the device before it could wake my roommate up. ''What?'' I whisper-yelled at whoever was calling.

''Pipes! Hell yeah, you picked up!'' I winced at the loudness and pulled the phone away from my ear for a few seconds. I used the opportunity to make sure that it really was who I thought it was. Yep, it was Jason. Or rather his shitfaced version, judging by the way he had slurred and prolonged the ''i'' in my name.

''What the hell Jason?'' I hissed at him, not sure if he was able to hear me over the loud music. He was probably at some bar or club. ''Where are you?''

''The place on that street, you know. Where we usually go. Me and Nico. Yeah, we're t'gether!'' I almost facepalmed. Oh great, that was narrowing the count to at least five places in ten-mile radius. ''Can you come 'nd get us? They say we're supposed to leave now.''

''Okay, tell me where exactly are you? I need the name of the place Jase.'' I tried to be more specific but it didn't help.

From the other end of the line, Jason laughed.

''Hey, that rhymed! Place Jase! Ha!'' and he fell into hysterics, totally forgetting that I was still on the line, waiting for an answer.

''Jase, Jason, JASON!'' it took him some time but he finally heard me. ''Give me Nico.''

''Oi Mclean!'' I didn't need anything more to confirm my suspicions that Nico was too in no condition to help me so I patiently asked him to pass the phone to someone sober.

''Sober?'' Nico asked with confusion evident in his voice. I almost expected him to ask what that is.

''Someone who doesn't seem fun.'' I sighed in exasperation and waited.

''Ah!'' he exclaimed as if that explained everything and a few seconds later I was greeted by a loud but steady voice.

In less than ten seconds I knew where to go so after a thanks to the stranger I disconnected the call before grabbing Annabeth's car keys and silently exiting the dorm.

When I entered the bar, I wasn't surprised to see Jason and Nico leaning on each other, laughing like complete maniacs while trying to stay upright. They actually knocked me to the ground when both of them came to hug me, leaning on me with their whole weight. It took the three of us around half an hour to reach the car and climb in. Nico passed away as soon as I revved the engine and I thought that Jason had too until his head popped next to mine not three minutes after.

''Soooo, whatcha doin'?'' I dared just a quick glance his way to make sure that I wasn't hallucinating or something before returning my attention back to the road ahead.

''Driving your drunk asses back home maybe?'' I answered, deciding that it was best to play his game. ''What's the cause of this anyway? Even Nico doesn't drink so much in the middle of the week.''

''Our lives suck.'' He explained, even nodding at the last word. I raised an eyebrow, since when Jason Grace complained about his way of living?

''Meaning?''

A heavy sigh, definitely exaggerated, left his lips.

''Nico's mad at Will 'cause he found out that he was actually Will's first boy…like let's-test-the-waters first, not that he was virgin or anything.'' I could see his head shaking furiously while he explained and didn't manage to suppress a chuckle. ''He's just only been with girls before that so yeah. And then he met Nico and decided to just experiment and I'm so gonna break his pretty face the next time I see him for this…''

I waited for him to start talking again but when he didn't, I looked his way again while waiting for a light to turn green. He wasn't asleep, he was just staring at the distance ahead with scrunched eyebrows.

''And you? What's wrong with your life?''

He turned to me lazily, his blue eyes only half-opened. He looked tired and miserable but tried to brush it off with a lopsided smile.

''Me? Oh, I'm just royally screwed for having feelings for my best friend. Maybe you know her, her name's Pipes.''

My jaw? Yeah, it was way down there, on the pavement, having dug its way through the floor of the car. I only managed to get back to the present when a horn sounded from behind us and I noticed that the light in front of me was green. We started moving again, but I was driving much slower now. Did I just hear what I think I heard? Oh well, only one way to find out.

''Why haven't you told her then?'' I asked, trying and failing to sound casual.

''Not worth the risk. I can always find someone to fuck but she's my bestie. You don't find a person like that at every corner you know.'' He said knowingly, as if it was some life lesson he had learned.

''And what if she say, return those feelings?'' I tentatively suggested, slowing down even further as we neared the dorm. I stopped at the parking lot and turned to him, waiting for his answer. He was still looking forward, seemingly deep in thought while leaning on his crossed forearms between the front seats. Finally, he shrugged.

''That would be good. But what if she doesn't?''

I was about to scold him when I realized that that was my logic for not telling him how I felt too. That's a pretty fucked up situation.

''And how long has this been going?''

He shrugged again, eyes closed.

''I dunno. We've always been super close. But I guess this is how things happen. You see her in a different light one day and you realize that hey, your best friend is a knockout! Then you kiss her and she runs away and you get scared shitless of losing her. So here you are, drunk as shit because you don't know if you should be happy that she's your best friend or sad that that's all you'd ever be to her.''

''Yeah, it sucks.'' I agreed, looking at the building ahead of us too. My thoughts were wild and I fell as if I've run a marathon when in reality, I hadn't moved a muscle in the last fifteen minutes. ''But maybe you don't have to worry. Maybe she's just as troubled as you and now that she knows, maybe…''

But before I could finish my sentence, he interrupted me with a quiet snore. I sighed in disappointment. He was fast asleep. I shook my head and exited the car, going to the back to try and wake both of them up. In the end, I got help from the man at the front desk of the dorm who helped me put those two to bed.

As I was easing Jason in his bed, desperately trying not to just let him plop heavily on the mattress, I ended up trapped under him, with my right arm under his heavy body. I tried to pull it away but it caused him to shift, which ended in me tucked in his embrace on his bed. The tiny thing was barely wide enough for both of us and I tried to wiggle out of his grip but the harder I struggled, the tighter he pulled me towards him. In the end, I gave up the fight, deciding that I won't care, not until the morning. The morning when he won't remember even calling me in the first place.

* * *

It took me a few seconds but when I noticed the black mess of a hair on the other bed, I remembered that I was in Jason's dorm room. That immediately explained why I was feeling so damn hot. I was lying on my stomach and he was too, with that difference that half of his body was on top of mine, trapping me and making it barely able for me to breathe. The window was closed, something that was pretty rare for this room and I cursed myself for not opening in yesterday. I tried to untangle myself from him as quietly as possible.

''Ugh, jus' stop jostlin' the bed!'' came a mumbled complaint from next to me and I stopped. Jason didn't sound awake and to hell if I wanted to be in this position when he actually woke up.

I put all my strength at lifting his arm, pushing at his shoulder and grinned triumphantly when the weight on my body disappeared. I slipped to the side which was my biggest mistake so far. I ended on the floor with a loud bang from my head connecting with the wood.

''Oh for the love of…Piper?'' I turned around on the floor just to see Jason, looking puzzled and still half-asleep, staring at me from the bed. ''What the hell are you doing here?''

''Yeah, good morning to you too Grace.'' I grumbled before pushing myself off the floor.

His face scrunched even more.

''Sorry, I just…'' he shook his head but then, his eyes closed tightly and he pressed a palm against his forehead. ''Fucking hell, my head hurts.'' He exclaimed before plopping back in his pillow. ''What happened and why are you here?''

And there went any chance of me being in a good mood today. I tried to not sound hurt or irritated as I explained to him that he had drunk-called me last night. When I reached the part when he told me about his feelings for me I paused. Should I tell him? It would definitely be easier that way, I mean I felt the same after all. It shouldn't be that bad but...I was scared. Standing in front of him, watching him I got scared shitless of losing him. What if it didn't turn out well. What if he only wanted me for a little while, until the next girl in his life came? I couldn't be just a notch in his belt, I wouldn't live through this.

I sighed and shook myself, trying for a smile.

"You drunk-called me last night to come and get you home from the bar. It was too late and I decided to stay the night here and...SHIT!" I was suddenly very up and awake. Man, I'm an idiot. Annabeth would just kill me! That is if she hasn't died from heart attack when she notices her damn car was gone!

I sprang up on my feet without feeling the pain of the fall anymore. I grabbed my jacket from the desk chair and my hands started feeling the pockets for my belongings: keys, phone, ID...All there. Good, at least one thing is okay this morning.

"Earth to Piper!" Jason's voice rose and I turned to him. He must have called for me before but I hadn't heard him. "What's wrong? Are you okay?"

"Yeah, yeah, I just borrowed Annabeth's car without actually asking. She's probably freaking out right now, I have to go." I tried to avoid his eyes, to not look too nervous and raise any suspicion of what had happened last night.

I hadn't made a step when he gripped my hand gently.

"Hey, can I talk to you later today? I really need to...to just say some things and it would be nice to do it while I still have the guts to do it."

My heart was beating so fast I had the feeling that he was able to hear it. When I looked up at his face though, I noticed that he seemed kind of nervous. Uh-oh. This was going to be bad. Well, might as well put an end to the suffering. I put a hand on his wrist before returning his gaze.

"It was you who hadn't called me in a few days. So when you're ready, you know where to find me. I'm always there for you no matter what." And with that I pried his hand off my arm and left without looking back.

* * *

It was pure luck that Annabeth hadn't called the police. When I came back, she was frantic (which was understandable, I practically stole her car!) so I had to go through one of her longest lections about priorities when it came to the dilemma if you should wake your roommate or just assume that she's okay with you taking her car. Yep, she sure had one of those, it got me surprised too!

"Okay just...don't do that again." She finally concluded with a sigh, dropping heavily on her own bed after pacing around for the last fifteen minutes.

"Sorry, I promise that next time I'll shake you up nice and good." I smiled, hoping to lighten the mood a little.

It seemed to work because I saw her crack a smile.

"I know you wouldn't have done it if it wasn't an emergency. So what happened?"

That was the tricky part. I didn't want to really talk about the events from last night but at the same time I wanted so badly to just...share the information, unload the burden if you'd like. Maybe she would have an advice. After all, she was the one currently kicking it off with a black haired surfer dude from her year. She should know about boys...guys...whatever.

So I told her what happened and where I was this morning.

"Okay, I can't decide who's more stupid, you or him. You should have told him something!" She scolded me, slapping my upper arm with the back of her palm.

"Ow!" I yelped, rubbing the spot while glaring at her. "Like it's that easy!"

"It is! You like him, he likes you. One of you two just has to man up and speak for gods' sake!" She said in exasperation. I had just opened my mouth to defend myself when she put her hand up to stop me. "You know what? Figure this on your own. Percy is waiting for me and I'm already twenty minutes behind schedule." She started fussing around, picking different things and stuffing them in her satchel. When she was done she walked hurriedly towards the door.

"Aren't you forgetting something?" I asked innocently and she paused, facing the door. One, two, three...and she turned around, palm up and waiting.

Trying to come off as innocent (it probably didn't work), I dropped the car keys in her hand.

"Have fun!" I said after her and she just raised her hand in acknowledgement before shutting the door behind her.

Ookay, it was safe to assume that she was mad at me, not without a reason too. I had to think of something to get in her good graces again. Not that she was able to be mad at me for long but still. I wanted to make it up to her, she deserved at least that much.

That would have to wait though because as soon as I powered up my laptop I realised that my writing project was still waiting to be finished. Ugh, how I hated writer's block. But I had to start from somewhere. So I grabbed a cup of coffee and settled cross-legged on the floor, my back propped up against the side of my bed and the laptop perched on my legs. It was time to get down to work.

Between writing, deleting, stressing out, drinking coffee like a caffeine addict and listening to some instrumental pieces, I must have fallen asleep because when I started regaining consciousness, I realized that I'm not alone anymore.

Startled, I jumped up, causing my head to bump in my knee somehow. Weird, I've never been much of an acrobat but whatever. When I turned to my right I sighed in relief though my nerves weren't settled.

Jason was mirroring my position on the floor right next to me. He didn't seem to notice that I was awake though. He was entirely concentrated on my laptop, even had his glasses on which was a rarity. Though he was nearsighted, he only wore them when on campus. Shame, he looked like a really sexy nerd with them.

I was about to ask him when had he come in but when I opened my mouth to speak, the words were replaced by a huge, noisy yawn.

"Morning sleepy head." Jason said in a surprising cheery voice. What the heck?

"And since when are you mister Sunshine after a night like last night?" I asked while straightening up a little. Man, falling asleep like this was a really bad idea. I could feel that more than a few places were sore while the rest...probably too stiff to acknowledge any pain. I groaned.

Jason smirked, his eyes still glued to the screen while answering me. "It's a secret."

He didn't saw me rolling my eyes at him. What was he even doing on my computer that got him all nerdy? I tried to be stealthy, leaning just a little bit...until I caught glimpse of a familiar word document.

"Hey, that's not finished yet!" I jumped up, trying to close the devise before he could go any further. No such luck, he pulled away almost at the same time, causing me to lie on his stomach while he was keeping my laptop out of my reach. The most infuriating thing? He didn't take his eyes off the screen even then.

"Just a second, I'm about to find if Jack is going to man up and kiss Maddie already!" He exclaimed, pulling away when I tried again to reach for his arms. "Hold still, will ya?"

"Is that why you are here? You know I hate it when people read my work before its finished." I complained, trying and failing to stop him from finishing the story.

Finally, I managed to reach the back of the laptop's screen and pushed it so it closed. My triumph brought a grumpy expression to Jason's face. I tried to ignore how cute he looked when he pouted like a child. I really needed to get a grip. "So why are you here again?"

All pretences dropped from his face so quickly that I would have laughed if it wasn't for the nervousness. He became all nervous half-smiles and averting eyes which was so unlike him. I started wondering if that was it, if he was going to say that he remembered last night and he didn't want to be friends with me. If he would laugh at me, saying that he was joking last night, that he didn't mean the things he said...oh gods, that was probably it! Ah shit, I was so royally screwed!

I turned away from him quickly and almost immediately I regretted it. My neck was stiff and the sudden movement brought a pain so sharp that my hand went up on instinct to rub the place. Never again am I falling asleep in an awkward positions, I swear!

"Nico reminded me of a nasty habit I have." His voice startled me out of my thoughts and I turned to him again, much more cautiously this time.

There was no trace of the awkwardness that was there just half a minute ago. He looked...like always. Casual yet composed. Confident but not arrogant. Almost laid-back. Of course, this could be a facade. Why would he hide his face from me if not for that? He knew that I could guess everything that he was trying to hide just by looking in his eyes. "I've forgotten how much I babble when I'm drunk. And I'm willing to bet that I said all the wrong things last night?"

I didn't know how to answer that question so I kept my mouth shut. It wasn't like he needed me to answer anyway.

The silence stretched and he finally chuckled.

"Yeah, it was probably the worst timing ever, right. But then again, there never seems to be the right time."

Was he serious with this?

"There's no such thing as the right time. You just do whatever you want to do or don't..." My voice faltered at the end because this was a crappy advice. Especially since I myself haven't followed it. I sigh. "Just...tell me now, okay?"

"Yeah, like what's the worst that will happen?" He said sarcastically, which caught me completely off guard.

"What do you mean? It's not like I'm going to kick you out of here!" I laugh, waiting for him to join but he didn't. "Gods Jason, we're adults!"

"I'm 21 not 30." He argued. Great, he was trying to avoid the subject.

I stood up, not able to be calm anymore. I would have preferred if he had blurted it out. But no, Jason Grace always thought twice about what was coming out of his mouth. Well, except for when he was drunk, obviously.

"If you're...ashamed or something, don't worry, it's not like I'm going to go share this on Facebook! This is me, Sparky!"

"Yeah, that's the problem right there Piper!" He finally faced me again, standing up. Towering over me. Greeeat. "It's you, my best friend since forever. You know me, the good and the bad. How you're still around, believe me, I have no fucking idea but here you are. And to risk that right here, what we have now for what it might never be? I'm blond but I'm not that stupid." Clearly, he was angry. Why? Beats me but if he thought that I would try and comfort him, well, he was wrong. The truth is that I got angry too.

"If you have manned up and just told me you would know that we're on the same page moron!" I shouted at him. It took me a few seconds to notice that his expression had changed yet again. Had I caught him off guard?

"You...what?" Oh yeah, definitely shell-shocked.

"I have this stupid crush on you since...I don't even know!" I finally admitted, throwing my hands up in the air in surrender.

"Then why didn't you say something huh?" Was he for real?

"You're dating girl after girl, hitting on everything with boobs that breaths and you ask me why? Think about it, maybe it will come to you!" I shouted. I felt my eyes prickle but tried to ignore it. I wouldn't cry. Not now, when he was right in front of me.

His eyebrows scrunched in puzzlement. It took him a few seconds to speak.

"You...what? Thought that I would push you away, laugh at you? You thought that I could do something like that to you?" He asked as if he didn't even want to think of such an option.

I felt my face heating and quickly averted my eyes. I sat back down beside the bed. I so didn't need for him to see my embarrassment and hurt. I didn't need his pity.

"You were dating all this girls...and you never seemed to notice me. Don't blame me for thinking that there was something wrong with me." I tried to sound angry, to not show how badly this hurt but I didn't think I managed quite well.

He sighed heavily, sitting right next to me. I could feel the heat radiating from his body. He was sitting much closer than before.

"And here I am thinking that I'm the only one." My head turned to him so sharply that I had the feeling that it was going to come off like a bottle cap. "You were always so casual and open with me. I thought that you couldn't see me as more than a brother. I didn't know what I missed, why I wasn't enough..." His voice trailled off but I couldn't miss the bitter tone.

A memory then emerged, one of him in first year of high school. He was naturally a person who didn't get angry so easily. He wasn't violent. But that day, when I chased him in the school's halls after he had punch some kid right in front of our math teacher, he was beyond both. I found him in the boys' locker room by the gym. He was shaking, his hands were balled into fists. His eyes were so strange, filled with something alien to me when he explained that his dad wasn't really dead, that his mom had lied to him for all those yeas. That his dad had just left them...

"Why am I not enough for him?" He had asked me then, tears threatening to fall from his eyes.

My eyes focused on Jason again. With this particular memory fresh in my mind I got an overwhelming urge.

"Ow Piper!" He said rubbing his shoulder where I had judt punched him. "We should really work on your people skils."

Before he could continue with his stupid statements, I put my hands on his face, forcing him to look at me dead in the eyes.

"You were always enough for me. More than enough."

It was hard to tell if I was the one that did it first or if it was him but who cares? The result was still the same. We kissed, our lips not moving in the beginning while I tried to wrap my head around the fact. Jason was kissing me. For real. Willingly and fully aware. He broke away just for a second. His eyes didn't even open before he pressed his lips to mine again, more eager and persistent. It took me a second but I started functioning again, my lips moving with his to match his tempo. So much pent up emotions, fears and insecurities...it's an understatement to say that it was heated.

"I love you Pipes."

I'm almost ahsamed to admit that I felt weak and light-headed with giddiness after his words.

Almost.


End file.
